The End of Things

So, Danny and Lu made up. I know I should be happy for them. I guess I kind of am, but I was really starting to like that girl, you know? This must be puberty--nothing makes sense any more. The world is just going all crazy. Danny and I kind of made up too, but I don't think we'll be able to be best friends any more. I mean, I kind of almost stole his nerdy girlfriend.

I guess I don't hate the idea of girls anymore because now I know Danny actually quit soccer because his aunt is so sick. He says he might start playing again when she gets better, some time in high school. He's not going to the same school as I am, but I hope he does anyway, so we can play against one another some time. I guess I really am starting fresh with high school--even my friends are being left behind. I guess I'll make plenty of new friends--people say I'm pretty social--but I guess as long as I have soccer I'll survive it all somehow.

Well, that's it, the last post. I really sucked at this project, but a lot happened this month. It was good to have some outlet to complain about it.

Honestly!

I swear that old bastard has it in for me. Yeah, Daddy Dearest...again. I kind of suck at foreign languages--I started taking Italian last year and just barely scraped by on a D+. Anyway, that ass calls today and tells me one of the assistant teachers' has a daughter my age who excels at that sort of stuff and she was coming over at three to tutor me! And who shows up at my door?! Lu! I was avoiding her, dammit! So this was incredibly awkward after the kissing thing.

Well, awkwardness aside, we did TRY to study like we were supposed to, then we stopped for a snack and I introduced her to Snow. It turns out she really loves animals and taught me this thing--for a toy, just roll up a ball of tin foil--she was totally right, Snow loved it. He couldn't play with it too much because his leg isn't totally healed yet, but he did swat it a little and roll around on the floor a bit.

I'm not sure what came over me, but I asked her to go see a movie with me Sunday Afternoon. ...she said yes. I guess, maybe it's okay to like girls--so long as they don't get in the way of the things you really love (like soccer!).

~Jess~

Oops...

Okay, so there's been kind of a major misunderstanding. It turns out that red-headed chick that Danny ran off with was his cousin, not another girl. His aunt is diabetic and when he ran off like that it was because she'd just collapsed and been brought to the hospital. Then I go open my big mouth and Lu thinks Danny is a cheating scumbag.

On the one hand, I know I should apologize for the misunderstanding. On the other, I don't really want them to make up. I mean, he's totally a better match for her than I'll ever be, but human beings are selfish, you know? Then again, I don't want to be Rebound Guy. I totally have to apologize. She'll never forgive me if she finds out we hooked up because of a misunderstanding and I never told her the truth--she's that 'honest' type of girl.

Guess I've got a phone call to make. Wish me luck.

~Jess~

Karma

I must have been a serial killer in a past life because my karma SUCKS. Seriously. It's HORRIBLE. Kevin, this guy from camp, saw when I kissed Lu the other day. He's buddies with Joe, so he told him, and Joe is dating Danny's sister, so now Danny knows and he spent all of yesterday night calling and hanging up. Juvenille bastard.

Then I started ignoring the phone, but dad got home and answered so that stupid fuck had to own up and copped out saying he was looking for me to borrow a dvd. My dumbass father invited him over for dinner! What the hell am I supposed to do now? Danny's way bigger than me and I think he's totally going to kick my ass--even though it's his own stupid fault for cheating in the first place...

Hand-Me-Down Girls?

So I...sort of kissed Lu yesterday. It just kind of...happened. I'm not sure how to explain. Tuesday she asked me if I would teach her a little about soccer, and since it's soccer, I totally agreed not realizing it was almost like a date--they guys said so, but I think they're full of it.

Anyway, yesterday we met up again because she said she wanted to practice dribbling more--and she's really awful by the way. Afterwards we were went for ice cream--she likes mint chocolate chip, just like me, and...i don't know what happened but we totally kissed. I'm kind of freaked. Should I call her? Or not call her? I mean, she was just dating Danny! Can nerds be sluts? Or is something there? But she's not even cute and I don't want to get involved with girls! Argh! I don't know what to do...

I Fail At Life.

Yeah, I'm like four days behind again and I only have an excuse for one of them. Dad's Day. Yeah, that day of the year when I have to pretend I love, respect, and generally think he's not an all around bad guy. And I guess he's not...for a parent--he got the usual gift--an ugly tie, a corny mug, and a self-defacing card about how much shit i'm always giving him.

After that I had to put on a monkey suit and go to one of those restaurants where every dish is 50 bucks and the plate is 90% garnishings. Then the freaking OPERA. I guess Dad always has had a thing for getting dumped by fat ladies, but I fell asleep before the intermission.

Since I'm so far behind I'll leave that post here and talk about the other days I didn't post in another post. Yeah, it's cheating. Bite me. I suck like that.

~Jess~

Library

I ended up at the library to return one summer reading book and put up another one. I avoid that place like the plague really--all that don't talk-don't laugh-don't even sneeze nonsense makes me feel kind of claustrophobic. And I don't know how to use the book catalog things right, so I end up wandering.

Lu was there--I guess doing one of those things dweebs do. She said being around all those books calms her, or something. When I told her it was the opposite for me, she kind of giggled a little and showed me where to find the book I was looking for. I really don't get nerds, but I'm starting to think maybe they're not all that different from normal people. Danny is a complete ass for cheating on her like this. I mean, just break up with her properly, you dumb fuck!

Keeping secrets can be pretty cruel to everyone, I think--the person doing the keeping and the person being kept, and everyone around them who has to support their decisions.

~Jess~

Kooties.

I'm starting to really miss the days when girls had cooties. Danny and I ran into each other at the park and we had a decent, civil conversation, and then he joined me to practice some penalty kicks...but then this girl showed up--yeah, a totally different one this time (much cuter), and he ran off. Whore.

I went to Groty's to get a bite to eat and ran into the super-nerd, who asked me if I'd seen Danny lately--and I wasn't going to lie for the sleeze, so I told her he just ran off with some redheaded chick. She started crying. Now, I'm not completely heartless, I don't intentionally go around making girls cry, but then her nerdy friends came out of the bathroom and started hollering at me! Lu--ah, her name is Lucille, apparently--she actually defended me and thanked me for being honest with her. I guess she's not so bad after all, for a total dweeb.

More later (gotta catch up again!),

~Jess~

Behind, Again.

Dad thinks I'm allergic to the kitten, but I don't care. I'm not getting rid of him no matter what! I'll suffer if I have to and take ten different kinds of sinus medication for the rest of my life. I guess I'm just that kind of person--when I find something I like I don't let go no matter what.

I like Soccer, and I like my poor little kitten. I think he likes me too. When I was petting him yesterday he started rubbing his head against my stomach. He's looking a lot healthier now too.

I guess I really do suck at this blogging thing though. The allergies were so bad, I fell way behind again. I'm gonna go out and kick the ball around a little, then come and post again.

~Jess~

Who Needs 'Em?!

Allergies!

Yeah, okay, I'm a day behind again, but I'm a shell of my former self. The pollen count has kicked my ass. I slept all day yesterday and just managed to crawl out of bed for orange juice and a bowl of lucky charms about ten minutes ago. Nothing I take helps. I'm a total mess.

I had to blow off camp today, but everyone there can kiss my ass anyway.

Blah. I feel like crap. I'm going to pet my kitten and lay down again. I'll try to catch up later if I feel better.

~Jess~

Girls over Soccer

Got blown off over a girl again. Damien was supposed to come by with some training videos for me and we were going to watch them in the living room and then go do some night practice. But I just got a call and Damien changed our plans to Sunday because he has a date. I swear, I'm losing all my friends to lipstick and short skirts!

If I ever fall in love, it's going to be with a girl who actually likes soccer--plays it, even. That way at least I'll still have a life. Girls, bah! Soccer is way more important than some stupid girl!

(caught up again. We'll see how long it lasts.)

~Jess~

No Camp

Soccer Camp was cancelled today because of the heat, so me and the guys went to the arcade instead. It's been a while since we've done that sort of thing, but it was kind of lame. Joe's become kind of girl crazy, and he and Nate spent almost the entire time across the street trying to pick up girls. After that thing with -you know who- I just don't want to be bothered about girls at all right now, so I ended up playing games by myself for a while before coming home.

More summer reading. Joy. This summer is really starting to suck.

~Jess~

Okay, so I suck. I'm unreliable and immature. I caught up on this blog only to immediately fall two days behind. But you know what? I'm FOURTEEN, what the hell do you expect? Adults always say 'I was a kid once' but I think they forget what it's really like by the time they have them. How am I supposed to live up to someone's lofty expectations when I don't even have the attention span to write a paragraph every day, huh?

The old man is up to his old nonsense. He actually gave me extra summer reading. EXTRA! Like two books isn't enough to deal with and still have a life my last summer before high school! Agh! So frustrated. He says I'll never get into the Ivy League if I don't get a jump start now. How old do I have to be, exactly, before I can make a decision of my own?

~Jess~

Responsibility

He wasn't mad. Kind of weird, but no complaints here. He said that as long as I take care of the kitten I can keep it, so now I have a kitty allowance on top of my regular allowance for food and things that I'll need week to week. Anything extra I have to put aside for when stuff wears out, like scratching posts and things, or as emergency vet money.

He said it might 'teach you some responsibility'. Give me a break, old man, I'm fourteen! I'm not supposed to be responsible until at least another ten years. Weirdo.

Anyway, we managed to get a vet appointment and now his leg is set and bandaged better. He's on some medicine for a cold too. Poor thing. He's sleeping in my lap right now. The vet said his mother probably abandoned him because she couldn't give him the care he needed. I guess we have a few things in common. I named him Spike because i think it's funny when an animal has a name that's completely contrary to their nature and because I suck at naming things.

Oh. He just woke up. He hasn't eaten yet today, so I'm going to try to feed him.

~Jess~

(Check it out, I'm caught up!)

SO Not Friends

That jerk Danny actually thinks we're still friends! He must be DELUSIONAL. He called today and actually invited me to double with him, his girlfriend, and his girlfriend's cousin, to a play. Not even a movie, a play. He said this Karen chick is cute, but I've seen his taste in girls--no way in hell. I told him and his loser girlfriend to bite my hairy ass. That little bitch actually had the nerve to call me selfish and snobbish! Danny threw that in my face when I blew him off too. I swear, if she had balls I'd hit her so hard her big, stupid mouth would come out the back of her head! Who the hell is she to say what I am and am not! Sure, okay, I'm a little spoiled probably, but I'm an only child, you know. All onlys are, but spoiled is not the same as selfish and snobbish! She's the selfish one for stealing my best friend! Bitch.

Man, it's way too early in the morning too. I've been dog-sitting for my Aunt while she's off on yet another one of those Carribean Cruises and she's some kind of masochist because she feeds that damn puppy at six in the damn morning, even on weekends. So I've been up since 5:30. Feed the dog. Take it for a walk. Give it a treat, go home and then come back and do it later. The pay is kind of crappy, but I'm still grounded so it's a good excuse to get out of the house.

I stopped at the convenience store for a slurpie and a donut and took my time walking home. On the way I found this kitten with a broken leg. Dad's going to be pissed when he finds out, but I felt so bad for him that I brought him home, cleaned him up and gave him some food. I made a little bed for him out of some old towels in the bottom drawer of my desk. If I promise something outrageous, I'm sure I can get the old man to take him to the vet. He's got a weakness for animals! I always catch him glancing in the window when we walk by a pet store!

He's still gonna be pissed though. Wish me luck!

~Jess~

Farenheit 451

Dad came home from drinking with his coworkers early tonight, so I started doing some of my summer reading so he won't get on my ass about doing things at the last possible moment again like he always does. My dad, the dean--loser. Problem is he's always going to know when I'm not doing my homework so I guess I'm stuck on that much at least.





Anyway, Farenheit 451 is this book about burning books--well, I'm all for it if it means I don't have to read any more of this one. Well, maybe it would be better if I wasn't forced to read it. I hate assigned reading so much it makes me sick. I wonder if there's a movie. At least then I would only be suffering for a little while.





(Check it out! Two posts in one day. I'm catching up!)





~Jess~

Still Behind

So, yeah, I know, I'm still two days behind even though I said I'd post twice yesterday. But the old man came home early with fettucini and clam sauce from La Cocina del Mar, so even if he was a day late, I guess he won a few points for remembering my favorite restaurant, at least.

After we ate he took me out to Sports Authority and bought me some new shorts and stuff. Nothing too exciting, really, but it's not like I need all that much right now--should have put off those cleats a little longer.

Right when things seemed to be going well that damn geezer just had to ask why Danny hasn't been by lately. Because of that ugly whore, obviously. Who needs friends when you can have pimple-sized breasts and duck feet, right? Whatever. Before I could censor myself I said "because he's an asshole."

So, yeah, my big mouth got me grounded. I should be able to catch up on this blog now, at least, I guess. For now I'm gonna go play some Madden though.

~Jess~

Worst Ever.

Worst. Birthday. Ever. And yes, I know I missed another day in this totally pointless blogging for twenty days thing, but bite me. I mean, my life totally sucks, right now. Not only did we lose the game, but I was totally showed up by Joe Nobody from the opposing team! I mean, what the hell? He doesn't even go to the camp, but just because one of their lame-ass midfielders got mono from being a whore, or something, they pull in this trailer trash loser to give me hell! I wanted to knock his teeth in. Seriously.

So I get home and not only has the old man forgotten what day I was born on again this year, but he ate my mac n' cheese! I wrote my name on it dammit! In PERMANENT MARKER. Bastard.

I'll post again later to make up for the missed day, I guess.

~Jess~

Nerds

Danny is such a loser. I mean seriously, his picture is probably in the dictionary. Loser, capital L--like he watched Revenge of the Nerds once and decided to run with it for the rest of his natural life. Thing is, Danny used to be a pretty cool guy--he's our former center back; Former, capital F, for seriously Fucked Up.

Okay, I'll admit that I'm a little pissed. Sure, it's just a half-assed camp team so we 'kids' have something to keep us out of trouble over the summer, but he's been ditching practice for the past two weeks. Every excuse he gave was totally lame and obvious, but today he showed up just long enough to officially quit the team? And why? Over some four-eyed girl with a pimple on her jutting chin. I mean, give me a break, she was wearing grandma shoes and she's not even cute. I guess there's no accounting for taste and Danny's apparently sucks.

He was wearing this 'teens for a green earth' t-shirt. Totally lame. I'm ashamed to admit I used to think that guy was cool. Quitting soccer over some girl. Lame Lame Lame! Agh! I'm so totally frustrated right now you have no idea. We only have two subs and they both suck SO BAD. Now I'm going to have to babysit defense for the rest of the summer unless someone amazing somehow drops out of the sky into our laps. I've seen the rest of the camp--not to be a pessimist but, yeah right. There's just no way that's going to happen.

Man, I'm in such a mood now. Nerds, you know! Who needs 'em? Not me, that's for damn sure. I hope Danny chokes on that ugly bitch's pocket protector. He deserves it for abandoning me like this. We've been playing soccer together since the second grade for chrissake!

Whatever, I'm going to vent my frustrations by playing GTA until I can't see straight.

~Jess~

Late Again

My father is always saying that I'll be late to my own funeral. I guess bad habits really are hard to break, but I'm not sure why he's already trying to kill me off.

Not everyone can be the perfect son, especially when we're talking about my father's standards. It's not like I hate the guy or anything, but being the only son of the dean of a boys' only prep school can be pretty rough. That's why I thought I'd show him how responsible I could be by posting a blog every day for twenty days starting June 1st. It being June 2nd you can see that I'm doing wonderfully so far. But that's totally not my fault! I needed new cleats, and then I ran into the guys and we decided to play a quick game. And then it rained and we got stuck in the clubhouse for four hours. It was so late when we got out that we decided to hit up Friendly's for dinner. When I got home I got a lecture about calling if I'm going to be late and decided to wind down by watching some old training videos. ...and I fell asleep.

Well, if I can do it from the 2nd to the 21st that's basically just as good, right? I'll show that old bastard who's never going to amount to anything!

Oh, yeah. For those of you reading this who don't know me, my name is Jesse Walsh. I'm turning 14 this week, and my one joy in life is playing soccer. That's basically it. I'm a pretty simple guy, but I'll save talking about myself for a day when I can't think of anything to say.

Day 2 or Bust!

~Jess~